integrating's Diaryland
Diary
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\"waiting\"
My diary is permanently fucked up as I do not know how to fix it. I try to change my template and it only changes the last entry. Who gives a fuck anyway.
I'm having terrible anxiety today fearing that my father is going to call me and start brow-beating me about getting a job. My aunt and my mother both have said I'm not ready to work. I need to heal. Which I felt like I was doing until I stupidly called my father.
To change the subject, the
iwearhats diary is funny. It was during a time that I hated my mother. We've gotten through that and now I love my mother and dread the moment she dies. During that time of that diary I was working, had friends and bashed my mother.
My father sent 3 packages to me via UPS. One of them is a printer. Don't know where the hell I'm going to put it. I have so many cords behind my desk I'm afraid to add another one.
I was talking to my dad last night. He gets frustrated if you don't get what he's talking about if you don't get it the first time and he was getting frustrated with me. It makes me very anxious.
So nothing to do today but wait for the computer tech, and possibly UPS. I sometimes feel lonely, but when a friend comes over I immediately want them to leave. I don't understand this. Something I need to speak to my psychiatrist with.
Hope you are well and having a great day.
11:57 a.m. - 02.28.12
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